Hoping to blog more

nida chowdhry, blog, writing, writer
This is where I got re-started a few years ago. I was sitting in my apartment living room in Hell’s Kitchen, surrounded by four Thai restaurants of the same name. My couch and coffee table were my office, dining room, and living room. I sat there and cried and tried to figure out my life. I often curled into a ball unable to leave my apartment. I had a telecommuting job from that same spot. And that is where I recommitted to write as a way of life, for life, for living.

I had felt suffocated for a while, like I was holding something in – myself. Everything I believed and felt, everything I had to offer and give, even if it didn’t matter to anyone else.

I thought back to these moments in life when everyone around me used their voice, took up space with their thoughts and opinions – with ease – even when bigoted. They struggled aloud. They spoke.

And I stayed silent. And processed. And brooded. And struggled to speak. To open my mouth. To bring what I felt to fruition.

I don’t know exactly why at this moment that I decided to dust off my blog. Maybe because I had been contemplating the larger question of what to do with my life. How to give from my life. Maybe because writing had been my way before. Reading had been my way. The way that I came to understand life – at my own pace, from the safety of a book. And writing, it was how I waded into the pool of my thoughts without drowning. It was a life raft, a boat.

This exact place – an internet space – was where I got started. Re-started. Re-connected with what I want to do in my life. To write and figure things out. To share and be honest. Vulnerable and raw. To go out having been myself.

So here I am. Dusting off my blog again. Finding and typing my way through existence life.

4 thoughts on “Hoping to blog more

  1. :) isn’t it interesting afterwards to reflect on how we were somewhere and then lost our path, only eventually to find a way through writing again. I guess we always underestimate our ability to write, take it for granted until destiny forces us from all around leaving only this as an escape. You only find it’s rewards afterwards, that feeling of content n comfort, of being home on your blog/diary.

  2. To write or not to write – that is the question. I recently encouraged my sister to pick up her blog again, asking if she was happier when writing or not. The answer is always when writing. Good luck, and I look forward to reading your blog.

  3. Glad you picked up again – writing is cathartic to me – like a creative release, like joy that it made someone else smile. And went I become avoidant or procrastinate, it weighs on me. Like I am not creative enough to have anything to say. Mostly, I enjoy your blog and am glad you’re back!

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